Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Mom...what do you think heaven will really be like

Hi is about 4 something in the morning and I couldn't sleep so I thought I would try to post and update.

We got my mother back to St. Augustine this past Saturday from Gainesville. It was a harrowing two hour ambulance ride with her in a GREAT deal of pain, but we made it. She is now back at Flagler hospital. We are trying to figure out what to do from there. Most likely a nursing home, but we have to see what their insurance will cover. She wants so badly to come home, but with two broken legs and other health issues I just don't know how we can manage that. I promised her I would explore all options.

Yesterday was pretty emotional...we started talking about lots of stuff...the stuff that nobody wants to talk about. We started letting some emotion bubble out as the reality of our situation begins to take shape. We started preparing for the future...the next few months and also the future without my Mom. I can't believe that I am saying that...she is only 63!!! For whatever His purpose is... this is the road that God has led us down and we will walk it with as much grace and strength as we can muster!!!

Please continue to pray for our family. Not only my Mom and Dad , but for David , me and the girls as well. Please pray that Daddy will come through this with a renewed faith. He doesn't "do" change very well and he is facing his entire world being rocked to the core. Pray for David as he struggles to find a place to put this in his head along side the death of his own mother just a month ago. Aly and Lili as they don't really have a clue what is going on...they just know that Mommy is not around every day and when I am I am either crying like and idiot or trying to find patience to deal with them without damaging them for life!!! And for me, that I will become the mother that my own mother thinks I am. She has such faith in me to raise my kids and I just don't know how I am going to do it without her!!!

Okay, so I must go try to get another few hours of is another long day.

Thanks to you all for the precious and wonderful notes and emails you have sent to give us your support!!! They mean the world!!

In HIS Mighty Grip...


Susan said...

Shelley, the one day at a time turns into one MINUTE at a time during times like these. Keep laying it at the foot of the cross. Over and over. You have already shown tremendous Grace.

sarahb said...

My heart aches for you girlfriend. We never get over needing our Mommas. The previous poster was right; you just keep laying at the cross and putting one foot in front of the other. Our prayers are with you.

Eileen said...

Oh Shelley, I just heard your news and I am SO sorry. My own mom died just over 2 weeks ago from pancreatic cancer, 3 weeks after she was diagnosed. I know a little bit about what you are going through. I'll be praying for you!

Allison said...

Oh Shelley, many many prayers for you and your family.

Susan said...

Shelley, you mentioned how crying might upset the noodles... and that made me think back to a month or so after my Dad passed away, one day I was crying so hard that I told our 3 yr old John I just couldn't talk to him right at that moment. A few minutes later I heard him in the bedroom saying, "Yes, she's breathing", and "No she is standing up"-- Then he walked into the room where I was and he was on the phone to 911. He had called 911 as recently I had talked to him about it and calling it in an emergency if someone isn't able to talk (thinking that would explain the 'I can't breathe etc.'

An ambulance had been dispatched to our house via John! I was able to convince the 'nice lady' that no, I didn't need an ambulance, I just needed my Dad.

Bryan and Gloria said...

Shelley and family,
Please know that you all are in our thoughts and prayers. We have requested special prayers for you at church too. Please let us know if there is anything we can do. Kiss those adorable girls for us.
Gloria and Bryan