(Play doh time with Lili!)
(Play doh creations by Aly)
I'm talking about the part where we get to lead these two Noodles down the road to adulthood. The part about shepherding two little hearts into the loving arms of their Savior. I'm talking about seeing that they get the spiritual food they need...and making sure that we don't leave any gaps that are big enough for the weeds to get in and when they do get in we promptly get them weeded out...by the roots!!! I'm talking about finding the balance of keeping them in the hothouse until their tender shoots are ready for the world and encasing them in a bubble so that NOTHING can hurt them ever!!
I'm talking about the parts that God pours into my lap every morning when I sit at his feet and ask for guidance as I teach them. I'm talking about the stuff that God shows me as I am reading the bible to my two precious babes...feeling so very in over my head. Oh, how I FAIL-FAIL-FAIL each and every day, but stand amazed each morning as God continues to pour out GRACE on me and gives me another chance and another task to teach them.
(Aly reading over the Psalm that we are memorizing)
David and I have been talking lately about the season we have found our little family in over the last couple of years. I feel like we have kind of retreated into the hills and are just clinging on to each other for all we are worth. But then it dawned on us that that might not be such a bad thing for now!
The more I look at the world around us, the more I think we need to be clinging to each other more. I'm not talking about "Gosh, I don't want them to grow up...I want them to stay little forever" kind of clinging. I'm talking about too much worldly influence and not enough parental influence. I'm talking about not being able to distinguish the "christian kids" from the "non-christian kids"...because they all act/dress basically the same! How sad is that!! I have seen too too too many families just throw up their hands and let the world have their kids. I mean, even "the world" under the guise of "the church" is pretty scary anymore.
I would venture to say that the parking lot on Sunday of most churches today looks much like the parking lot of any other place on any given day. With the exception of a few bibles going in, they all pretty much look the same as the rest of the world. We attended a church a while back where the after-school youth program looked like the mall parking lot on any given afternoon. You wouldn't believe clothing that the kids were allowed to wear or the things that were going on in the parking lot!!!!! But nobody would stand up and do anything about it because they didn't want to offend the parents and they didn't want to exclude the kids from coming to "church." What on earth is THAT about?? We are supposed to be different!!!
I mean, think about it...we live in a society with more churches, more bibles, more Christian "tools", more "church" activities, and more "church" schools than every before, yet it seems that fewer and fewer "Christians" are living lives that are transformed and defined by Christ! What is wrong with that picture? It has become all about "church" and less about Christ!!!
"These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts
are far from me."
Do David and I want that for these girls that we fought so desperately to get? I mean there are still adoption issues that we are dealing with and I don't want those to be resolved by the world either...they need to be resolved by us and a loving Father who is guiding us. They are only 5 and 3 now, but they will be teenagers soon and if we mess this age up then we don't stand much of a chance later on!! I read somewhere that kids are pretty much who they are going to be by the time they are SEVEN! SEVEN YEARS OLD PEOPLE!! Whether that is right or not, it makes a good point. Don't you think?
(Aly reading to her sister)
We have been attending a wonderful church, but wow...it is just so big. Is it too big for us right now in this season of our family? Is it too big to be effective for us? Is there still too much of the world getting in and not enough God getting out? Are we turning over too much of the raising of our kids to even the church? Then there is the fact that we have chosen not to send our children to public school. We have chosen to home school them. Their futures and their character and their lives are just too important to trust to anyone else. I'm not starting a debate here...just letting you know how we feel, so don't get offended. I'm just saying that we felt that there was just no room for compromise for our family. (Check out this article for a wonderful explanation...) We are JUST getting started and sometimes I feel like I am the biggest idiot on the planet for thinking I can do it all ...but then I remember that it's not about me. God doesn't call the equipped...He equips those whom he calls. So we will continue and fail and try again and all the while God's grace will be enough to cover all of it!!
We are praying for God to lead us to a group of believers with whom we can cling closely. A small group of like minded families. People with whom we can worship as a family. For now we will continue to pour the words of the Lord into our little ones hearts and minds. We will trust that these words will take hold and guide them as they grow. A confederate soldier by the name of Hugh A. White memorized scripture as a small child under the watchful care of his mother. He said, ..."Before our minds could grasp their meaning, simple formulas were fixed in our memories which should afterwards prove lights to guide our steps aright."
(Then again, maybe it is Watson or Sherlock Holmes?)
So, here we are... asking you God. We are standing at the crossroads and we are asking for the ancient way...we are looking for rest for our souls...for our family.
" Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him'" Lamentations 3:22-24)
In His MIGHTY Grip~